Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
