so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
