David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
