I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
