Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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