your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
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