We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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