just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize