I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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