do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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