The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
