I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
