And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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