he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
they call him Oral-B. enough said
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
