i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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