i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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