I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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