what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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