I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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