omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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