So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize