i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
