Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
