Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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