Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
