The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
farters have to be the big spoon...
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize
