weddingsv make me drug and hornr
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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