Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
