At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
