There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Slut skills are useful in every country.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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