absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
