Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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