talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
