New invention idea: vibrating tampons
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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