Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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