I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize