But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
