A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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