This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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