I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
