dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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