butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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