I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
