I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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