We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize