DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
