i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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