i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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