is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
