the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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