i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you traded sex for a burrito?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
