i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
